Choices

My experience at the police yesterday made me think over the many bad decisions I've made in my life. Since being in Belgium, I've frequented the lowest forms of mankind niavely, and realise I haven't really looked closely at who my friends are/were. Thankfully, since becoming sick, I've taken myself out of circulation and therefore have had time to reflect. In many ways this is a good thing, but it means that I've been on my own for over 4 years. As they say here "better alone than in bad company"! I've been in some strange situations with some strange people, and the only reason is because I didn't really "see" what I was doing or who they were. I was even married to one of these people. Only after "getting out" do I realise how psychologically unwell this person is. My mother could see it, from the first time she met him, but as they say "love is blind" and I was certainly very blind. No more. I'll probably end up on my own, because of these mistakes in the past, and that's OK. I'd rather be alone and comfortable than with someone who abuses me or makes me feel less then I am. It's such a treat to meet young women who "know" what they want, but more importantly, know what they "don't" want! I didn't get much guidance as a young person in any ways of the world so I probably ended up here because of that. But I'm a big girl now and it's not an excuse anymore. Your life is in your hands, and you've only got one, so don't screw it up by making big bad mistakes...again and again.